Music Soothes the Soul

Music Soothes the Soul

(See Jeffery Thompson, Jonathan Goldman, Steven Halpern, Tom Kenyon, & others)

Take time out to listen to music designed to help you 
heal and transform from the inside out.

Plug in and let the music do the work.

Notice what happens to your attitude and your choices now.

What Are You Choosing?

What Are You Choosing?

(See Science of Mind by Earnest Holmes)

 We always have the opportunity to come from choice.

With so much going on around the planet at this moment in time we must ask ourselves: 

"Am I being swept up in the outer vibrational frequency and the collective unconsciousness 
or standing firm in the Law of Individual Selection, knowing God is my Source?”

Know that we all have the power to choose.  
We can choose the way we think, the way we act and the way we react or respond. 
This is the "Law of Individual Selection" at work in your world.

What are you choosing now?

Journaling for Transformation

Journaling for Transformation

HERE's a short video of this strategy.

Becoming more authentic and aware of what we are thinking and feeling requires change. 

Change takes work and it is through self-examination and reflection that we can make sense of the situations we face and information we access. 

Journaling just 20 minutes daily has many positive benefits; if you want to use it to tackle a difficult situation you’re now facing, try the following approach:

Use the “What? So What? Now What?” Model (Driscoll, 1994) 
of exploring the events of your life to access the wisdom of the connection between your head and your heart:

What? = What happened? What was the event that you experienced? What did someone say or do?

So What? = How did the situation/event affect you? What thoughts/feelings/reactions are you left with? What else does this remind you of?

Now What? = Focusing on your actions/beliefs/feelings, if you could replay the event/situation, what would you change? What did you learn? What was the good that came from this?

Handling the Inner Critic

Handling the Inner Critic 

(And the Inner Conflict!)

We all have inner chatter -- various "voices" or parts of ourselves giving advice and direction at any given moment. Sometimes the inner critic just goes too far in its urging, though, and another part of us rises to argue with it.

Here's a quick process for quieting the inner critic in the moment, followed by a more in-depth process for handling the source of it.

Process #1
Step 1
Once you become aware of the critical inner voice, say (either within yourself or out loud, depending on where you are), "STOP!"

Step 2
Make a list of your positive qualities. Aim for at least 3. If you can't think of them easily, then maybe imagining what a close friend would say they like about you.

For example, someone I worked with recently said,
I'm adventuresome. 
I'm hard-working. 
I have great friendships.

Step 3
Tell the inner critic this:
Even though I feel this way, I also know I'm... 
[fill in with the list you made from step 2].

For example:
Even though I feel scared and don't feel confident about leaving my fiancé, and I don't want to have these feelings, maybe I could start to make peace with what is happening. It's ok for me to want to protect myself and keep myself safe. I'm learning to trust myself more and more.

You're meeting the inner critic from another angle instead of arguing with it. 
(Just as in our relationships with others, no one really "wins" an argument!)

Notice what happens when you stop arguing 

with the inner critic.

Process #2
Step 1
Similar to step 1 above, say (either within yourself or out loud, depending on where you are), "STOP!" Then, LISTEN to what each side of the inner argument has to say. Write down what is happening within yourself.

Step 2
Often each side of the inner conflict has an unmet need* that it's trying to bring to your attention. This step might take a little exploration or you might already KNOW what the needs are. 

Here are some examples of needs we humans have:
Appreciation          Adventure          Belonging
To be believed in          Challenge          Creativity
Competence          Love          For protection
Safety          Power          Expression
Support          Acceptance          Connection/Community
To be heard          Respect/Respected          To be seen
Understood          Valued

*NOTE: there may be more than one need that isn't being met. Keep it simple and focus on just one at a time.

Step 3
Decide how you will meet the need. It could be as simple as giving yourself permission to have it! 

For example, you might say,
It's ok to want.... Right now, I'm choosing to do.... instead.

Or

I see now that I have a need to be valued AND I have a need to feel safe. I wonder how I can do both right now?

What happens when you stop arguing 

with yourself and find out what's at the bottom of it?

Your Emotional Guidance System

Your Emotional Guidance System

(Inspired by Ask and It Is Given by Esther Hicks & Jerry Hicks)

Your emotions are indicators of how you’re reacting to the people and events in your life. They also show your degree of alignment with your true self. The better you feel, the more you are in alignment and the more you feel free, powerful, and loving. You know you have value, you have purpose, and all is well. Steps in this process:

1.      Identify the emotion. (Use the included emotions scale if you can’t name it right away.)

2.      Simply allow the emotion to be there. What is its message?

3.      Allow the emotion to pass through your body, affirming that it has a role in your life and in your development. You could imagine the emotion as a leaf floating down a flowing, peaceful river or stream.

What is the MESSAGE of the emotion(s) you were feeling?

Color, Color, Color!

Color, Color, Color!

It's a new kind of meditation and it seems to help quite a few people... 

Find a coloring book. (There are so many for adults now!)

Or, if you just want to download a page or two, try this site or this one.

Pull out your favorite crayons, colored pencils or markers.

Put away your phone, computer and tablet.

And color away for 5 or 10 or 15 minutes.

Just color.

Don't worry about staying in the lines.

Let go go the need to make it neat.

Release yourself from making it perfect (if you can).

Color. Color. Color.

Notice what happens internally and how your perspective is shifting

about whatever was bothering you. 

Take whatever step that comes to you next.

You are Seen and Appreciated

You are Seen and Appreciated

By Peggy Black

Allow yourself to feel 
the love, the gratitude, the acknowledgement that is being showered upon you 
by all those who have had a connection, a contact, a friendship, 
an interaction or relationship with you in any way at any time.

Allow yourself to be acknowledged 
for every kind deed and action

that you have ever offered to anyone, quietly,

from the kindness and compassion of your heart. 

Allow yourself to remember 
all the times you have laughed, giggled, chuckled, smiled 
and shared a precious moment with another.

Allow yourself to be honored 
for each and every time you enriched someone's life 
by your conscious actions, your examples, your commitments, 
your dedication and your big love.

Allow yourself to gather 
every precious memory of your most unique life 
and fill yourself with gratitude and joy for all that you have experienced. 

Allow yourself to know 
that you are seen and appreciated 
as the magnificent being that you are, making a difference in this world.

You are a special woman/man/person,

who touches the lives of others 

and they are made better by your presence.

"The curious paradox is 
that when I accept myself just as I am, 
then I can change." 
-- Carl Rogers

Notice what happens when you allow yourself 

-- for even just half a minute -- 

to accept yourself exactly as you are

what happens to your thoughts, feelings and actions.

Connecting Head and Heart

Connecting Head and Heart

(see HeartMath.org)

Sit down in a quiet place and relax your whole body.  You do not have to sit with crossed legs if that is not comfortable.  The important thing is that you relax your body so that your mind can be as free from signals of discomfort as possible.  

Focus all your attention on the area of your heart -- 

the area of the center of your chest and heart chakra.  

Recall a person, place or situation that brings to your mind and heart compassion or love. 

Allow appreciation, compassionate or loving feelings 

to build and spread within your body, radiating from your heart.  

Let the sensation radiate throughout your torso, arms and legs, filling your body. 

Spend 5 to 10 to 20 minutes with this sensation.

How do you view your current situation now? What has shifted?

Life is But a Dream

Life is But a Dream

Examine the elements of the situation/concern you are experiencing as if it were a dream.

Imagine that each element is a symbol that has a message for you.

What is the new message (lesson) of what is happening in your life?

What is one thing you can do differently now?

Affirmations

Affirmations

(See Louise Hay; Shakti Gawain, others)

The key to affirmations that work for you is that you have to already believe them a little bit!

If a recommended affirmation (“I deeply and completely love myself”) 

isn’t something you believe yet, then start with,

“I’m open to…” followed by the affirmation of your choice.

What are you affirming now?

Guided Imagery

Guided Imagery

See Amy Frost (AmyFrost.com), Effective Learning Systems, BelleRuth Naparstek (HealthJourneys.com) and others

Spend 5 to 15 to 30 minutes listening to guided imagery.

If you're not good at "visualizing", don't worry about it! 

Just listen to the guide and allow yourself the time and space to relax.

Focus completely on the reverie of the recording.

Or, try this:

Close your eyes if you can. Take 3-5 slow breaths. 

Imagine you're at your most favorite place, a place where you feel safe and at peace.

What do you "see" in your surroundings? 

What colors are most vibrant? Or maybe they're muted...

Notice the temperature on your skin.

Continue to breathe slowly.

Notice if there's a breeze or if there's warmth from the sun or a pleasant scent in the air.

Breathe even more slowly.

What sounds are in your peaceful, safe place?

Breathe...

Allow the sense of peace to flow through your body and mind.

This is what peace feels like.

From this place of peace, what next right action comes to you to take?

When you're ready, focus again on your breathing.

Take 2-3 deep breaths. 

Bring yourself back into the here-and-now.

Slowly open your eyes.

Pay attention to what’s happening internally after you’ve listened.

 Make notes about your next steps, then take the first one.

Play

Play

Take time out to play! 
Even if you can take only 10 to 15 minutes, it could make a difference. 

It’s when we’re in this child-like (not childish!) state 
that our energy shifts and we’re able to see things with fresh perspective.

When you return to your current situation,

what new perspective has your playtime brought to you?

Body Awareness

Body Awareness

Where in your body

do you feel this concern/issue?

Is there tightness in your heart? Or an ache in your gut? Or a pain in your back?


Take some time to tune into your body to figure out

the possible significance of what is happening.


The body often "speaks" in metaphors. 
The tightness in your heart may signal a concern with a relationship.
The ache in your gut may be a link to thoughts and feelings of trust or safety.
The pain in your side may be pointing you to the kind of support you're receiving (or not!).

What is the message your body is trying to bring to your attention?

Walk

Walk

When you're struggling with knowing what to do,

 something as simple as taking a walk may make a difference.

Take a 10 to 15-minute walk to clear your mind and heart.

Pay attention to what's going on around you. 

What sights and sounds and smells do you notice?

How does your body feel as you walk?

If you can, find a still, quiet space inside.

What insights come to you?

Be Your Own Happy

Be Your Own Happy

It really DOES involve taking care of yourself, you know. 

Instead of pushing other people to find out why you might be feeling the way you are now, turn inward.

You may fall apart, but maybe becoming your own happy requires that you fall apart in order to pull yourself back together differently.

Practice self-compassion, too.

To be your own happy, you may have to open your eyes to your patterns of being, of interacting and doing. This asks you to move beyond your comfort zone.

So...

Be curious.

Be courageous.

Be ok with being scared. 
(In fact, you might even try to do one thing scary every day! This one has bonus material for our brains, which like novelty and actually begin to function better when we stretch ourselves.)

With each thought, action and interaction you do differently, you'll learn better who you really are.

AND, you might be surprised to find you're proud of yourself for trying something different.

In the words of the poet Rumi:

"Be crumbled

So wild flowers will come

up where you are.

You have been stony for

too many years.

Try something different.

Surrender."

What happens when you surrender to NOW so you can 

BE YOUR OWN HAPPY?

Call for a Consult

Call for a Consult

Tell your story to someone who is a trustworthy and valued listener -- someone who can simply listen without offering suggestions or solutions until you're ready for them.

As you talk, notice the areas of “stuckness” you’re feeling. 
This is usually a variation of the same "story" you've told before, 
the same pattern of interacting you've experienced in the past. 

Ask your listener to help you "see" the pattern or story. 

Maybe it's time to tell a different story!

What has helped you get “un-stuck” before?
This is when your listener can offer ideas or possible solutions.
(If they have only one idea, that's advice!)
Work together to figure out other solutions.

What could you do now?

Don't Think. Just DO.

Don't Think. Just DO.

If you find that you tend to overthink situations, first create a basic plan. 

Once you've created a plan, trust that you'll work out the details and just start taking the next step in your plan. Don't rework the plan or overthink what might or might not happen.

Take action and just do what's next.

And then take the next step...

Notice what happens when you're taking action 

instead of spending time, energy and effort 

on thinking and reworking your plan.

I AM…

I AM…

Remember this: what is happening now is not ALL of who I am.

Even in the middle of this, I AM also...
(Name 3 positive qualities to describe yourself. 
These are ALSO parts of who you really are!)

__________________,

_______________, and

__________________.

Affirm this within yourself:

As I am, I AM the embodiment of love/compassion/wisdom.

In this moment,

I only have to be who I really am.

A Quick 33 Seconds…

A Quick 33 Seconds…

See The Last Adventure of Life, FindhornPress.com
or Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain

Imagine how you will be/feel when this situation/concern has been resolved.

Focus on the feelings you intend to have. 

Imagine every detail of what the resolution looks and feels like.

Mentally surround the situation in pink light

and put it in a bubble.

Focus on this imagery for 33 seconds.

(This can be a challenge, but if you can stick with it, 
you’ll increase the odds for a successful outcome!)

RELEASE the bubble

and the situation/concern

then move ahead in your day.

Be on the lookout for signs that what you imagined might actually happen.

Well, THAT Didn't Work!

Well, THAT Didn't Work!

One of the differences between successful people and those who give in to failure is in how the experience is labeled. What to YOU say about what is happening to you? 

Do you say, "I failed at..."?

Or could you say, "Well, THAT didn't work!" And then try something else...

What else COULD you try?

"What If Up?"

"What if UP?"

From What If It All Goes Right? by Mindy Audlin 

(cited in Joe Vitale's The Miracles Manual: The Secret Coaching Sessions)

What if, instead of thinking about and wondering what would happen if something doesn't work out for you, you ask yourself, "What if up?"

"What if up?" invites you to begin to imagine what might happen 

if things go in your favor. 

"What if this is the best thing that could happen for me?"

"What if this changes my life from here forward?"

"What if this is a pivotal point in my life?"

"What if this is the greatest idea ever?"

"What if this is the best investment I could make in my life?"

Notice how your energy shifts as you engage you imagination in a way that serves you instead of limits you. 

What if your next step is really easy?!